This is us!!

This is us!!

Monday, February 2, 2009

Being a mom

So I find myself sitting here and wondering how on earth my mom raised six boys. I have three and some days I feel like I have no sanity left. Today is one of those days. I feel like my life is spinning out of control and I have no way to stop it.
Landon has really taken to school and has up until recently been a great student. Over the last 2 weeks, he has gotten in trouble quite frequently. I've talked to him and his teacher and have yet to come up with a reason as to "why?". He has never gotten in trouble before and now he is making a regular habit of sitting in the hallway during writing time.
At the same time, Brett is well into his terrible 2's and throws tantrums quite regularly. Adam is my happiest most of the time, but when he gets mad, he stays mad. And lately, it seems that they all 3 need to be acting out at the same time.
Where we live so far away from family, I rely heavily on the support of Ben and our friends. But, when your children are acting like that, it makes it hard to do anything but sit home and feel sorry for yourself. There is no going out to lunch with the other moms.... not when your kids act out all the time. There is no going on a date.... not when no babysitter in their right mind would come and watch 3 rowdy boys and now a puppy!
So, most of you who know me are saying "what's new?" Well, dealing with the chaos is not new, but the overwhelming stress of wondering will it get better before we add number 4 is. Or am I doomed to have screaming as a background noise. Being pregnant and trying to stop the spinning is harder than it has been in the past.
We had a lesson in YW about finding the joy in womanhood. With all the craziness that comes with being a mom, its easy to forget to look for the joy in it. I'm guilty of it, I think we all are, but when all is said and done, I am a mom. I would not trade my worst day as a mom, for a day without my kids. I love them dearly and that is why I deal with the whining, crying and yelling.
That is why I change the diapers, clean the house and fix the food. Because everyday, even bad ones like today, I can find things about my kids that bring me joy! So, now I know how my mom raised six boys and still had enough love to have 2 girls.... it's called being a mom!

4 comments:

Michelle said...

Well first I have to say CONGRATULATIONS!!! I am just now learning of the pregnancy! That's really great! When are you due? I can definitely sympathize with you on the stresses of being a mom. Don't let the two girls fool ya! Sierra is a Holy TERROR! If you ever feel up to it you could drive into Denver and bring the boys here, and they can help Sierra reek havoc at my place, and we can just watch, and shake our heads; reminding ourselves all the while how much we love our little "angels".

Julie said...

Whenever I'm having days where it seems all I do is deal with whining children I try to remember that they won't be little for very long, so I try to hug them a little more often and tell them how much I love them (sometimes just to remind myself more than them). But, there are those days that when Chris gets home I say "I'M DONE!" and go hid in my bedroom with the door locked for a while. But, I'm with you, I won't trade being a stay at home mom for an outside job even on bad days.

Jayme said...

first of all...EVERYONE gets overwhelmed! Our two kids are 8 and 10, pretty well behaved and are both in school for 8 hours a day....oh yeah, AND I have a full time job. So I really don't even spend more than 6 or 7 hours a day with them. yet, I still have MANY days that I am also guilty of locking myself in my room! I throw some essential oils into a heater that goes around my lamp, turn on some ENYA and just lay down to get away from all the noise! So having three young boys and dealing with it 24 hours a day.... you are truly my HERO Sarah! keep your head up, rent them a good movie that will keep their attention and relax... least until the first fight breaks out mid way through the movie ;)

Unknown said...

Well I cant say I know how you feel now but I am sure one day I know all too well what that is like! I love this post. So often people only whine about the hard stuff about being Mom, but you included why you love being a mom amidst the chaos. i appreciate that you included that part because I think that anyone who doesnt appreciate the precious role of being a mom is blind!! Of course you have hard bad days but you wouldnt trade it for anything!! I love that. It makes me want to be a mom even more!! But anyways you are amazing and so unslefish and you are a great friend and a great mom!!